RENT!!!!!!!!! BEST MOVIE EVER!!!!!!!!! WOOT WOOT FOR IT!!!!!!!!

I love Rent!!!!!!!!! It is the best movie ever!!!! I just saw it. It is sooo completely awesome! I mean OMG IT IS THE BEST MOVIE EVER!!! I CAN'T STRESS HOW MUCH I LIKE IT!!!!!! WOOT WOOT FOR IT!!!!!!

WHO ELSE HAS SEEN IT AND THINKS ITS THE BEST THING EVER!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! iF YOU COULDN'T TELL i AM HAPPY!!!!!!!!!! And on top of that... I don't feel bad about Marc anymore... I know hes not worth it! HAHA!!!!! DIE MARC DIE EVERONE WHO HATES RENT AND DIE SADNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOT WOOT FOR THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow.. My life sucks!

I am soo confused about life... I don't think I will ever post my thing about Dr. Zidan... I don't know... anyway... MARC IS A HORRIBLE PERSON!!! HE MADE ME CRY MYSELF TO SLEEP LAST NIGHT!!!!!!! AND HE SAID HE DIDN'T CARE EITHER!!!! HE SAID "Future presidents don't cry" I AM SO SORRY!!! I AM 14 YEARS OLD I AM GOING TO CRY!!!!!!! I hate him! I mean I am going to be someone right?!?!?! I am someone! RIGHT?!?!?! He told me I will forget about him when I find someone my own age to go after... But I will never forget him... I wish I could. I mean he is too important to my Freshmen year... I wish I knew how to get over him... My life is sad... I know that. I know it is sad to live on blogs and stuff a lot. ERR!!!!! My life sucks!! and I love my friends.... those who truly care about me!

Wow... what a day....

It was soo... BAD! I don't know why. It just was... I guess it was the gloomy weather. But just like how yesterday was really good today SUCKED! Oh and another good thing that happened yesterday, MARC DOESN'T THINK I AM HIS STALKER!!! WOOT WOOT! That will make my week. I told him that too.

.. iujkjk;gftpv That was my kitty- full kitty. She say "HI!!!! I am Natasha. My mommy is the best! I love her! and I am the best little kitty-full kitty in the world! WOOT WOOT FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!!" Oh yeah! I love my kitty! and she loves me too! WOOT WOOT FOR HER!!!!

wow,,,

Today was unusually good... it was like WOW! I don't even know why... it just was.. HAHA! I'm bored now... but yeah... I guess it was such a good day because nothing bad happened. That hasn't happened in a while. I mean Saturday was really good but I mean like a school day... WOW! Yeah... I leave you with a random quote from Livia:

"WHAT?!?! You're FIXED?!?!?!" HAHAHAHA!!! I Livia. yeah... HAHA! Just so y'alll know... I'm NOT fixed! HAHA!

WOOT WOOT!!! WHAT A RELIFE!!!!

Ok, so the March in Fayettville is OVER!!! WOOT WOOT!!!!I don't have to worry about community service anymore! I GOT IT ALL TODAY!!! WOOT WOOT!!!!! Yeah, and I don't have to worry if things are going to go right. THEY DID! Or at least my part (the breakfast) did! HAHA! And I met a 7, yes a SEVEN year old who can BREAKDANCE!!!!! I mean I HEART BRENNA!!!!! SHE CAN BREAKDANCE AND SHE IS ONLY SEVEN YEARS OLD!!! HAHAHA!!! GO HER!!!!!!!!! Yeah, ok that bit of radomness taken care of. Now, onto the March. FUN! Maya and I bonded and I got about a billion pictures taken of me!! WOOT WOOT! YEAH! GO US!!!! I was very moved by hearing an Iraqi doctor speak. But to the counter prostesters across the street: SHAME!!! SHAME!! SHAME ON YOU!!!! YOU DIDN'T EVEN RESPECT THE LADY YOU SAID YOU ARE FIGHTING TO HELP! YOU ARE HORRIBLE PEOPLE! FACE IT! Yeah, the counter protesters this year were REALLY disrespectfull. It was just flat out HORRIBLE! Oh well! I guess EVERYBODY in the world can't be smart. HA! Oh yeah and the guy on the highway! HAHA! So, this guy (obviously a rebublican) tries to drive Mom off the road. then we are passing him and I look at him. His kids are watching a movie in the back and I was trying to figure out what movie they were watching. He FREAKED OUT! He started going REALLY REALLY fast and then rolled down the window and started screaming at us. We couldn't hear him but we knew we didn't want to. Then he started riding mom's tail. We started a conversation about agressive driving. VERY FITTING!!!! HAHAHA!!! Yeah, so more on today later when I am not so tired. 'NIGHT PEOPLES!!!!!

Bored and Lonely (from earlier today)

I am bored and lonely as you read above. I FEEL SO ALONE!!!! No one knows how I feel.... NO ONE CARES EITHER!!!! The fact that no one cares hurts more than that no one knows. It is sad... OH WELL! Y'all want me to be happy again, right? SO PLEASE ASK HOW I FEEL ABOUT THINGS!!! MAKE ME FEEL LIKE YOU CARE!!!!! AND BE SPICIFIC!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!! I NEED SOME ONE TO DO THAT!

What I have realized (post on Tuesday March 14)

I have realized that only about 5 people in the whole world truly do care about me right now. And I care about much more that those 5 people. But they don't love me and care about me back. I am not talking about just males. I mean like my "friends." They don't care about me. I have NO ONE! It hurts. Yeah.

Songs of Sat. March 11

You're Beautiful by James Blunt
because that's really a lot like (actually I think it is) how I feel about Marc

Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield
Because my life is just begining. and I am just starting and it has an amazing message. That's how I feel about my life. I will not be quiet because "no one else can speak the words on my lips."

Beautiful as You by All-4-One
This is for my kitty-full kitty. That's how I feel about her. I haven't seen anything as beautiful as her

Sugar Rush by A-Teens
this is also how I feel about Marc. He is my sugar rush!

All That I am (Sorry) by A-Teens
explained two posts down. Very deep song. I feel like I want people So many people to sing it to me.

You Are by Lionelle Richie
THis is the one Delilah played for me. That expains it all.

Reality by Richard Sanderson
I once thought this song sucked! But then Maya was playing it to get on my nerves and I listened to the lyrics and it is like my Marc situation.

I Knew I Loved You by Savage Garden
Jeremy. I know I love him and I haven't met him yet. I LOVE JEREMY SUMPTER!!!!!!!

Those are a lot of my feelings right now put into songs. Yeah. Most of them are about Marc. But that is simply because he is the sorce of the majority of the emotional pain I have right now.

Wow... (post on march 10)

THe most memorable part of my day thus far: History. all I can say is WOW! That was one of the most, well actually I think it was the most, unproductive class we have EVER had! IT WAS SO MUCH FUN!!!!!!!! And Mr. Christian was hot so I told him he might wanna take his sweater off and then he wouldn't be so hot. Right? Me just trying to be a smart ass. Right? Yeah. Then Mr. Christian goes "Zoë, DON'T YOU EVER AND I MEAN EVER TELL ME TO TALKE OF AN ITEM OF CLOTHING AGAIN!!!!!!!" And I was like "I didn't mean take your whole shirt off. Just the sweater! GEEZE!!! THAT IS SICK!!!!" IT was funny! Oh, and Mr. Christian couldn't get the TV to work. IT was sooo funny! He had a note card he wrote "NO" on and upside down it says "ON" right? Yeah, so he pulled it out of his pocket and it said "ON" and he put it up to the TV and said "ON!!" IT was funny too! HAHAHa!!!! ooOOH and we had to draw our best renaissance art for extra credit on our test and I asked if i could draw a sculpture of a man and Mr. Christian spoilled the fun. He said I could only do it if it didn't have detail. Which sucks 'cause the detail he was refering to was the part I was working hardest on. I had the head going perfect. And things were perfectly rounded and all that jazz. Yeah. Bottom line: History class today was FUN!!! FUN I TELL YA FUN!!! But I still am depressed about what I talked about last post. If you haven't read it I suggest you do since I will be refering to it an awfull lot in the near future. Yeah, that's pretty much all. I could go on with History but I don't feel like taking the time to type it right now. I will get back to y'all with the rest of the story! BYES FOR NOW!!!

Song of Wed. March 8

I'm sorry, made you feel sorry Last night, I came home too late And you were there waiting I know, it's easy to call I guess I wasn't thinking of you It's not that I don't care You should know me better by now I am sorry if I made you lonely and sad I am sorry I made you feel bad What I'm trying to say I'm not always that way So love me for all that I am I know (I know) I often forget To say that I love you (that I love you) And yes (and yes) I truly regret The times that I might have hurt you that way It's not that I don't care You should know me better by now I am sorry if I made you lonely and sad I am sorry I made you feel bad What I'm trying to say I'm not always that way So love me for all that I am True, I may defend the things I do Though I know deep down I've done wrong But when the heat comes down it's you (It's you) that keeps me going on For all that I am I'm sorry, made you feel sorry Trying to say that I'm not always that way Love me for all I am sorry if I made you lonely and sad I am sorry I made you feel bad What I'm trying to say I'm not always that way So love me for all that I am (For all that I am) That I am (For all that I am)

Yep. that is the song of now. I just wish someone would say that to me. I mean my friends are making me feel this way and so is my family and *sigh* Marc. I mean he has made me feel this way for a LONG time but now it is really hitting hard because my friends and family are doing too. *sigh again* I feel so lonely. And tomorrow I have to do a report on alientation and lonelieness in Ender's Game. And it might make me cry because I know EXACTLY how it feels. (to be alieanated and lonely I mean) My life just sucks right now. and a few select people can make it better. but they are not! They are making it worse.

Oh, and something I forgot to add to my list of "why I hate you's" : "I hate you because you have a crush on Marc." Isn't that sad? I actually got that from some people. It's not my fault my hormones are going crazy! I mean GEEZE!!!! I am a 14 year old girl. My hormones are GONNA do that. And it's not like those people haven't had crushes like that before! ERRRRGGGG!!! I just feel so stressed to end the crush and that is only making it worse! I think Delilah was right when she said I should just let it go. I should just go through with the crush and let it be done with. I mean it will be a lot easier to get over him I am not thinking about it right? Even if that is when he goes off to college. He won't be a part of my daily life. Like I won't have to see his sexy car or him in the morning. It will be SOOO much easier. Ya know? That's ok you don't have to! OH and like this afternoon I was blowing kisses to the car because ya know it's a mini cooper and I have wanted one LONG before him. and so I was blowing kisses to it and saying I loved it and he walked by. I was like "*blows kiss* I love you!!!! I love you sooo much *makes kissy sound while blows another kiss*" and he looked at me like "OMG!!! You little loser! What the hell are you doing?!?!?!" I felt like he thought I was talking to him. I wasn't! But oh well. I mean that is going to happen in my life. because it is MY life. It just sucks. But like I said.... oh well!

on a happier note: Meagan is a witch. Mr. Christan knower of all things (exept politics) said so! We hung her and cut open her body and had DaVinci draw pictures of her insides!!!!! FUN!!!! That is really my WHOLE happier note! SAD!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh and I had nightmares about Mr. Christian in the shower making moaning noises. DON'T ASK!!!! I AM WARNING YOU!!! DON'T ASK!!!!!!!

Bye people... I am going to get ready for bed now. even though I will not be able to sleep because I will be so sad. ! (wow... I can't believe I ACTUALLY used a smiley! HAHA! Don't get used to it y'all!)

I think I will do this...

I may post all my Xanga entries on here too. Just 'cause I feel like it. I am also posting them on MySpace. I shall post all the important ones on here K? K!